The ding of my iPhone 5c screeches, starting my heart beat. The pricks of hair on my forearms stand attentively, cautiously, as I reach for my phone. Blood rushes
Sexual emoji chain messages my face and my hands are cold, clammy, and tingling. Slowly, I allow my eyes to gaze upon the message displayed across the cracked screen:. But sorry because it is a part of the human experience and to miss out on it is comparable to missing out on grief or sadness.
In order to feel true happiness, one must first experience the sexual chain text.
According to the ever-reliable Wikipedia. Like Al Capone and neon green relish, the chain letter is a long-lived progeny of Chicago, first appearing a Methodist missionary academy for women inand becoming a domestic terror since. Initially, the messages began as innocent letters. We are here together to discuss the monstrous fiend the
Sexual emoji chain messages letter has morphed into as time has passed. So fast forward almost years. The reason the sexual chain text flourishes is its mysterious origin.
Found in the dark, moist, cracks of human shame are the Cocktober pioneers brainstorming how to generate the next holiday mass text bursting with cum-related puns.
The same reason we mate. The same reason we eat pizza.
Basically, there is a primitive instinct that remains in the homo sapien genome that makes us do whatever necessary by any means necessary in order to survive. But no matter your emotional state after reading the closing statement of the message declaring that you must forward it to Sexual emoji chain messages set number of friends or else a misfortune will occur in your life, you forward it.
Or at least I do. Will I truly die alone with no friends and zero romantic prospects if no one sends this message back to me? I better spread this message like wildfire if I want to die with friends.
The sexual chain message reflects two major social notions regarding both our generation of shameless internet addicts and American society on a grand scale:.
Such insecurities include the fear of judgement passed on us by our peers based on our humor and congeniality, suppressed anxiety and depression that we can distract ourselves from with boorish entertainment, lack of intellectual resiliency and magnitude concealable by eggplant emojis, and plain, run of the mill boredom. You are commenting using your WordPress.