Smart men and not-so smart men. Smooth, awkward, shy, outgoing and so many other different kinds of men. So why is it so hard to find the right man for you?
How can a woman meet a Discouraged from dating to friend she is interested in? A man that is available? A man that may also be interested in her? The answer is… it depends. It depends on who you are and what your life is like; do you live in a small town or a huge city? Are you in college or are you a single mom? How many of you just cringed at that part? Well, vile as the thought may be to Discouraged from dating to friend twenty-or-thirty somethings, even older women get that itch.
And even older women want to be loved. There should be something here for everyone. We all have that friend who seems to have so many men she has trouble remembering their names.
We secretly loathe this friend for the ease with which she does this while simultaneously accepting gigs as her wingman in the hopes that the other wingman may be of interest. Does it ever work? I bet there is even a couple out there whose love story began on just such an occasion.
Instead, treat it as an opportunity for a night out.
Maybe you two will hit it off. Still, even a boring wingman has friends. One of those friends may be someone of interest to you. So keep an open mind.
Get to know that wingman and find something to enjoy about the evening. Try to ignore your friend making out with her date and focus on your counterpart. You never know where it could go! "Discouraged from dating to friend" was going to have to be discussed some time, so I brought it up early: But the evolved concept does live on, generationally altered from its ancestor.
There are two versions of a blind date today: Or maybe his breath smells like kitty litter, or his laugh makes you seriously consider fleeing the scene. On the flip side, you may also have to bear in mind the very faint possibility that he may not be into you, and remind yourself not to stalk your friend for updates, or hold her responsible for his disinterest.
And sometimes that dude you meet at a party, or in a bar, or at a traffic light does turn out to be a person of interest. The catch is, if one or both of you does not recognize this, the opportunity vanishes. Especially when it bears the angst of missed opportunity.
I still remember two specific times I was approached by strapping young bucks while out and about on my daily life. The world is an arena, and you are a gladiator.
Slay those fears before they slay your spirit. Rejection is not the worst thing that could to you. Flirt with no expectations other than the curiosity to gauge his reaction. Learn from it — were you projecting desperation or confidence?
Did you give a sly smile, or were you staring longingly at him, so he could see you envisioning him meeting your parents or your kids? Because those, dear Reader, or two different animals. One is a tiger, the other a parasite. Let your energy be your roar.
And the men will come to Discouraged from dating to friend. Far from the stigma the online dating scene used to bear, now it is hot! My first venture online lead to a serious relationship that was also seriously unhealthy. Because I did not make smart decisions, or listen to my instincts, or accept the advice of friends, I found myself overwhelmed with the response I got when I posted my profile. This was new to me. So the dating scene was totally new.
The men came so fast and in such numbers I had to print out their profiles and take notes to track who was who. This is where I made a big mistake. There was one guy — Max I think- who was funny and cute but clearly not someone with long-term potential.
I learned from that mistake. Now you can too. To learn to accept rejection and to gracefully reject. His wrath was immediate and his words hurt. I was not prepared for that.
Against the advice of friends and family I allowed myself to be swept up by him, and while there was an initial wave of happiness, that was but a precursor to the tsunami of destruction he crushed me and my boys with. We barely made it out of that one and I surprised even myself with my decision to try again. My second foray online was conducted much differently. This time I was the one with confidence. This time I made mistakes but did so with eyes wide open and a smile on my face, because those mistakes were fun.
I did not allow anyone to make me feel bad when I told them I did not feel a connection, and I did not take being rejected "Discouraged from dating to friend" heart — much. I assembled a committee of advisors and provided them full reports, accepting their advice and having a blast.
I found the man who helps my own light shine brighter, who fires me up and cracks me up.
And you can too. Last but not least, we have the hybrid method. It is precisely what it sounds like — when one or more methods combine to produce a man.
For instance, I met my husband naturally, in a bar. And yet the reason I went to that bar "Discouraged from dating to friend" a blind date. My sister planned to introduce me to one guy, who arrived at the bar with his gorgeous girlfriend on his arm. But then his friend showed up and my life changed.
This can also occur in the wingman method, as mentioned above. Or really any of the methods if you allow yourself to pay attention, slay your fears, and acknowledge rejection and heartache as empowering opportunities rather than defeat. It is up to you to take charge of finding the one for you.